We've agreed to reduce the appointments to once a month. I think I've made a tremendous amount of progress since starting. Before we meet, I have to fill out two forms. One form is for anxiety, the other depression. I was basically in "if one more bad thing happens I will kill myself" mode originally so I guess its cool to see that go down. Anxiety is about the same, maybe higher due to that one issue.
I didn't bring up my constant worry that my friendship with Stef is basically over this time. Maybe I should have. IDK.
Money was not a deciding factor in my choice here. I mean, losing 119 per session stings but once every two weeks is managable. If it I had little to no results, it would be unbearable.
This weekend was a huge deal for me because like, can you believe I had two days in a row where I didn't feel disgusting in my body??? and I actually posted a picture of myself?? That's huge!! Idk. I think its a big deal. I already told Nate,Kaitlyn, and Colorado friend.
on 5/28, when I hung out with my old friend. He told me something that I for the life of me cannot get out of my head. Something about it was just so comforting and euphoric. I think the closest I could think to finding that level of peace was when I hit the back of my head working at sonic and I could only percieve the color white and the feeling of cold. Anyways, he was telling me about watching Jersey Shore. At first, he was didn't like it but once you actually watch the show, you "get it." Anyways, Snooki and these guys were up late partying, drinking, doing whatever and naturally, Snooki wakes up super hungover with some guy. So, what's a person to do while hungover? If you said, "go to a bar," then GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!!! But yes, Snooki and this dude, hungover af, go to a bar. Snooki gets a shot. I don't know what the shot is but I feel like Fireball would be the most appropriate so that's the reality I chose to live in, the Fireball reality. anyways, they take the shot, and in a chipper, happy voice, Snooki says, "yum!"